Dalliance, Love, Marriage With Vikram Bhatt
“To me, marriage is an
archaic and oppressive institution that should have been abolished years ago.
And love? Its magical comfort food for the weak and uneducated. Yeah, it makes
you feel all warm and relevant but in the end, loves leaves you weak, dependent
and fat” says the character of Matthew Mc Conaughey in the film ‘Ghosts of
Girlfriends Past’
Vikram Bhatt’s views are not far behind! Vikram has not only blazed a trail for his own brand of cinema but is also known for his unconventional personal life.
- In my years of knowing him, he always came across as a very outspoken, real person sans pretensions, positioning, flim flam! So that when I was the Indian journalist doing the documentary ‘Twenty Four Hours In Mumbai’ the French journalist with me asked him superciliously ‘what do you feel about poverty in India’? Vikram answered cockily ‘what do you feel about drugs in France?' (sic).
That pretty much says it all. Direct, self-assured, wry humor & delightful.
So his views on the current
scenario of marriage , while unconventional, are stimulating.
Is it obsolete according to him? Does marriage have consequence in our times or is it just an institution to give us support and succor? In this age many view it as a “contract” commissioned by the government ‘to disenfranchise intercaste, interfaith and interracial marriages.’
Is it obsolete according to him? Does marriage have consequence in our times or is it just an institution to give us support and succor? In this age many view it as a “contract” commissioned by the government ‘to disenfranchise intercaste, interfaith and interracial marriages.’
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As we sit at his
spacious sea-facing home, I reflect over a cup of coffee that Vikram could have
made an actor, with those eloquent eyes and expressive features, were he not
set upon being a director! There is an engaging politeness about him, and in
that earnest expression, is a hint of watchfulness - asking questions of me
even as I am questioninghim. Gauging? And eloquent as they are, it is the eyes
that reflect his cynicism about marriage , while trying all the time to be non-judgmental
of those that still believe in this age old institution.
As we talk, his
expression gives away that flicker of personal disappointment, that touch of
vulnerability.
With a wry look he
answers my query "there is a Chinese saying that says, ‘are doomed to make
some mistakes’. We are waiting to trust- wrongly- when we shouldn’t. Marriage
is a legal issue, seldom an emotional issue. A marriage of minds is more
important. 
However societal infrastructure is important. Marriages are broken
all the time today, so how is it any more dependable than living together. It
is an ironical paradoxical situation.” He continues charitably “but then to
each his own. If you feel documentation and ceremony is important, you have a
right to it. Personally I feel it’s bullshit. What you get from each other is
more important. You can cop out any day either way isn’t it? There are
different circumstances, different drivers for everyone.”
Given a chance would
Vikram marry again? “I wouldn’t marry again. To me societal, ritualistic institutions
don’t exist. Why does love and marriage have to be the same, I don’t confuse
marriage with emotion. There is nothing emotional about marriage. Through time
marriage has been used for kings to retain their kingdoms and recently for
business families as tradeoff’s, and shouldn’t be confused for love.”
And what about love?
“it has been invented by Archie’s cards I think” and we laugh together at his diverting
observation. “Love is actually lust and companionship. – A very marketable idea
for people still looking for it. It is a very selfish emotion, an immediate
response of “I love you”. It is a seeker, it seeps you. It is merely the old
animal lust of mating and seeking someone who likes the food, sex, music and
you basically seek things in common.” So you say to yourself “Gotcha! That’s
the combination I want. We’re all seeking a combo of requirements. Over time
the person changes. Then you say you’re not in love, because you’ve changed.”
True love for me is
that of a mother for a child, selfless, non-male-female, universal. It’s just
different things for different people” concludes Vikram, as his mother walks in
with fresh coffee. "He is the best son in the world!" she dreams of
her son being the next Guru Dutt. But Vikram is practical. "All I want to
do is entertain myself and the audience". Getting the audiences to see my
films is the raison d’etre to be in the business after all! Vikram describes
his creative experience "I see the entire film in my mind in two days!”
The designer in me resonates – indeed that is how it is for a truly creative
person!! “And then I set out to create the film as I saw it”.
Stimulating views,
intelligence and charisma, yes I look forward to seeing more of his work, often
a welcome break from convention –
watch this space!
Nisha JamVwal
Follow Nisha on http://nishajamvwal.blogspot.in/
& Tweet her on @nishjamvwal
Email Nisha at nishjamwal@gmail.com
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